these texts are an archive of my life in the San Francisco Bay Area from march 2007 - march 2015. it stands as a record of close to a decade of my life, charting the struggles i faced as an artist, daughter, and lover. messy and chaotic at times, eloquent and poetic at others, these texts are an index i am proud of. it was here in this electric box that i learned how to be honest about my experiences and the person i needed to become. it was here that i first learned the truism that words make the world and how to trust such a beautiful, rife, hard fact.

thank you for meeting me here in such tall grass.


my artist website is here.

Jan 24, 2014

what aftermath?

.


wash my whites.

take my pill.

"don't forget your shirt"


hungry to reminisce
my bad deeds
the things i've done that would make my mama hate me
determined to earn it
she hated me for no reason
never once made it a secret thing.



i hold my breath
i don't want your death around me
i'm familiar enough

but put your hand around my throat

i want to feel a real fear for once
it gets tiring
being afraid of nothing.


keeping busy

chasing all the ugly names.

some type of hurt that is honest and sure.

some type of hurt i can't explain.


.







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