these texts are an archive of my life in the San Francisco Bay Area from march 2007 - march 2015. it stands as a record of close to a decade of my life, charting the struggles i faced as an artist, daughter, and lover. messy and chaotic at times, eloquent and poetic at others, these texts are an index i am proud of. it was here in this electric box that i learned how to be honest about my experiences and the person i needed to become. it was here that i first learned the truism that words make the world and how to trust such a beautiful, rife, hard fact.

thank you for meeting me here in such tall grass.


my artist website is here.

Jul 14, 2009

tuesday afternoon truism...

back at my canvasses today. i inadvertently took a few days off and, though i felt pretty guilty about it at the time, it has definitely aided me in a lot of great ways. the best one being i'm calming down with all that frenzied "NOW! NOW! NOW! GOTTA FINISH THE PAINTING TODAY!" crap i put myself through with the last two paintings. i'm done beating myself up for no good reason. i'm trying to keep to beating myself up for GOOD reasons ONLY. ha! we'll see how long i can make that one stick. when it comes to the art thing, i am such a huge and pitiful glutton for punishment. no more, i say! no more! i want to enjoy being an artist- the luxury of it. having the time to play in paint is a pretty big privilege. and not one that everyone gets a slice of or fights to keep. i've lucked out in a lot of ways and i'm thankful everyday for the life i am currently leading. maybe that's where all the weird self-punishment comes from? masochistic? just a little. :) and that's silly. the best thing i can do, the most honest way i can give thanks and show appreciation for what i've got is to really enjoy them... not squander them by wasting time thinking badly of myself and my work. i'm in a good place. it's my job to remember that. and to protect it.
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2 comments:

Heather Jerdee said...

It is a good place isn't it? I did a few peoples hair today and while it was a good thing, it was a huge relief to be done with it and be back to my now regular art making life. I finished that oil painting I was working on and that one day you posted about that conversation you had at your gallery hit home, I tend to forget A. I haven't been painting as a adult that long B. I hopefully have a long art making, painting, exploring, life ahead of me. Enjoy the ride yee-haw, (of course I over think and tend be masochistic too a wee bit) :)

Your day at the beach sounded wonderful.

July 14, 2009 at 5:35 PM
angela simione said...

oh, it was wonderful! i'm hoping we'll go back this coming saturday. and this time with sandwiches. :)

i totally want to see the painting! yay! how'd it feel to work in oil again?

July 14, 2009 at 11:21 PM

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