the day is bright already and there is a feeling in it... something in the light that makes me want to take pictures and dress up all silly and become, once and for all, the small town freak. whenever i walk through town (which isn't very often), i get stared at a lot and i think it might be the silver sequined shoes i wear. they're quite blinding in the sun. they're awesome. and i got a new pair of blue sequined shoes but i'm waiting to break them in til the weather gets a bit less wet. they are not puddle-jumping shoes. i need a pair of those yellow rubber rain boots. i've always wanted a pair of them. i'd wear them everyday, all winter long, sequined shoes underneath.
i'm getting ready to brew a second pot of coffee. i've already spent two hours painting. it's the perk of painting in-doors... especially in the kitchen: you get right to it. and, after a few days of looking at the photograph of the most recent painting, i decided it is not done after all. i cheaped out on the background. all that work on the aprons becomes meaningless if i allow myself to take a short-cut somewhere else. so i've been working on the background again and it's already so much more full than it was before. i am much much MUCH more pleased. i just needed a few days away from it, some distance to see what was really going on. it's a beautiful painting and i will do my best to honor it. no short-cuts. struggle, struggle, struggle away until i get it right. winter gives me the time.
these texts are an archive of my life in the San Francisco Bay Area from march 2007 - march 2015. it stands as a record of close to a decade of my life, charting the struggles i faced as an artist, daughter, and lover. messy and chaotic at times, eloquent and poetic at others, these texts are an index i am proud of. it was here in this electric box that i learned how to be honest about my experiences and the person i needed to become. it was here that i first learned the truism that words make the world and how to trust such a beautiful, rife, hard fact.
Dec 23, 2009
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2 comments:
Struggle and sequins. Not incongruous, truly.
hahaha! that reminds me of your poems. :)
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