yesterday was grey almost all day long. little flashes of sun here and there but mostly just grey grey grey. and i had to get out of the house so i did and i went to the oddities shop and looked around but everything was too expensive to bring home so then i went on down the road to the used bookstore.
my new strange education in fairy tales has got quite a hold on me and i realized that i never read fairy tales as a child. never. and so i went to the children's books aisle and stayed there for a long, long time. i ended up finding a very old and quirky copy of Hans Christian Andersen's fairy tales and put it under my arm as i made my way to the literature section. there were two young men there. they came nearer to where i was browsing and started talking all pompous like, dropping big words and critiquing Dickens. it was all pretty sickening and obnoxious and i thought there must be a girl in here they're trying to impress. and then they started talking about the importance of poetry - the aisle i had moved in to with my children's book under my arm - and the one said to the other that "as strange as it may sound, my favorite poet is Shell Silverstien..." and i realized right then that the girl they were trying to impress was me! ahhhhhhhhhhhhh! i got so uncomfortable! ack! no!!!! i hate that shit! i really really do! i mean, i did look pretty stylish yesterday. i was wearing my "i love you but..." banner and black velvet pea-coat but come on! i'm buying a children's book for christsake! how in the world is that hot? i mean, i suppose it could be intriguing but.... nah, not really. just horny dudes who think big words impress little girls with long hair and blah blah blah. word to the wise, guys, that shit doesn't work. save it for the classroom or other appropriate venues where inflated vocabulary fits right in. but using words like "morose" and "debauched" and going on and on and on about how boring Moby Dick is and creeping closer and closer to the lone woman in the poetry aisle is OBNOXIOUS AND CREEPY! even if i were single, these two dudes wouldn't stand a chance. gross! and i say that without even knowing what they look like. i didn't dare make eye contact with this pair. they were getting way too close to me and i wasn't about to encourage their pathetically horny behavior with even the quickest of glances. they were actually hovering. not smooth, guys. not smooth. this is what happens when i go out in public with my hair down. serves me right- how frivolous of me to go out scouting for fairy tales with my hair down! hahahaha!
anyway, they eventually left and i was free to lose another hour reading the backs of books comfortably. i think i've grown so accustomed to living in the countryside that unwelcomed human contact with anyone gives me the creeps and shivers.
but Grey Thursday is gone and i successfully side-stepped the walking erections that lurk inside the used bookstore. the sun is out and shining and The Almighty Jog awaits. i've been playing with my poems all morning and feel happy and satisfied and eager to get back to work. my maids are still speaking to me, giving orders and telling me what they need. i pray the good light holds so that i can answer their beautiful, beautiful call.
good morning!
these texts are an archive of my life in the San Francisco Bay Area from march 2007 - march 2015. it stands as a record of close to a decade of my life, charting the struggles i faced as an artist, daughter, and lover. messy and chaotic at times, eloquent and poetic at others, these texts are an index i am proud of. it was here in this electric box that i learned how to be honest about my experiences and the person i needed to become. it was here that i first learned the truism that words make the world and how to trust such a beautiful, rife, hard fact.
4 comments:
how frivolous of me to go out scouting for fairy tales with my hair down! hahahaha!
*SNORK*
wv: zocucto
I dunno. It's an extremely cool word. Like the coolest conductor in the world or a train conductor who takes you to Wonderland.
ps. That was Zoducto. I typed it wrong.
xo
hahahaha! they must have mistook me for a damsel.
Lord Zoducto! and as a train conductor i am picturing crispin glover in Dean Man even though he wasn't the conductor but the dude who shoveled in the coal. but Lord Zoducto would be crazy and not age at all just like him. perfect. my favorite real-life vampire.
I love Crispin G. not only does he do a fine job of playing odd creatures acting wise, but he is an authentically odd creature. Like me. And he just rolls with it. I love that.
xo
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