these texts are an archive of my life in the San Francisco Bay Area from march 2007 - march 2015. it stands as a record of close to a decade of my life, charting the struggles i faced as an artist, daughter, and lover. messy and chaotic at times, eloquent and poetic at others, these texts are an index i am proud of. it was here in this electric box that i learned how to be honest about my experiences and the person i needed to become. it was here that i first learned the truism that words make the world and how to trust such a beautiful, rife, hard fact.

thank you for meeting me here in such tall grass.


my artist website is here.

Jun 2, 2009

the dance continues...

i've been up since 5:30, working since 6:15, and am already knee deep in process. yesterday's idea to let The Jog wait until evening proved to be a bad one. oops. :( so today i'm back on board with my waking rituals and routines. they help too much to let myself slide too far away. and in spite of making a fair amount of progress on 2 canvasses yesterday, i feel bad for not getting exercise. i did take inga on an evening walk but it's not nearly the same thing. not nearly. focusing on keeping my legs moving and my breathing controlled offers a breed of clarity that i've really been benefiting from in the studio. finishing the 1.7 miles in the morning kicks my day off with a sense of strength and accomplishment which quickly translates in to some pretty effective painting once i get back home. i must continue and let the process be what it is and not let things like my NOW, NOW, NOW enthusiasm for progress get in the way of, well, progress. :)

last night i did a bit of grant and residency research. i'm trying to force myself back in to a "homework" state of mind. the dreaded artist statement re-write is upon me. i need to do 2. one for my practice in general, and one specifically tailored to the maids. i suppose it'd be okay to put the latter off a bit longer- i should probably finish up the 4 canvasses i've got going before i get all analytical and stuff about it. besides, with each new work, the ideas i'm working with become simultaneously more clear and more complex. i need to follow the process and explore the image and see what it's really capable of before i start making concrete statements about how the paintings are meant to function. the brainiac stuff can wait. for now, the work is personal and i want to enjoy that end of things for awhile longer. it makes for better painting, more sensitive and sincere painting.

the day awaits.

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