awake...

i painted hard this weekend. hard. black and black and sepia and more black. glaze and glaze and polish. and though i am quite pleased with the progress i made across all the canvasses and should feel content with the idea of relaxation, i can hardly sit still. maybe it was that pot of late afternoon coffee. i even took an evening jog to burn this energy down. i avoid my morning vineyard as if it were a hated ex-boyfriend during weekends (especially long weekends) because it isn't so secret and is pretty well known to tourists with rented bicycles. my peace is defiled. i go out with the mosquitoes and drowsy birds when everyone else is sitting down to dinner. the big quiet and my hard breath has become precious. too precious to share almost. for the first time in 4 years, i'm back in the silent, solitary joy of The Jog. i've returned and it feels wonderful. so completely wonderful. i've missed this so much. more than i can say.

getting out of bed tomorrow morning will be dreadful but i will do it. 5am will get here quick. tomorrow is a white paint day with early fog and a morning vineyard just for me.

sweet dreams.